Yes , i'm an idiot , but i thought you would love me anyway :(
Why the fuck do i love you ? I know - because you're a sweet motherfucker who i knew most of all people , who loved me frankly for who and what i am !I love you because i remember how hard you loved me , but i hurt you and i'm sorry and you can't understand how it kills me that you can't take my apology ! You put a spell on my soul but now .. It seems like you don't remember any of it!It's been six months and we didn't say a word to each other , not even hello when we pass by . We started hanging out with new people in a new environment but unlike you - i didn't forget . From when you left i was all soaked in tears , the old wound hurt more and more every day . My definition of time is - hopeless and disappointing , because i spent every hour , minute , second hoping that I'll see you , that you'll text me - that some miracle would happen . That i figured out - i'm not gonna just sit around moping with you not even knowing that i love you - so i took the first move . One day i told you everything , at first you didn't believe me but after some time you started showing those little sparks of love to me again . We started talking again . With time i won your heart again and we were reunited as a couple . Unfortunately , we both felt that something wasn't the same. It was me again , i hurt you once and now again something was wrong with me - it's like i was unhappy , our last dates i started being miserable . You didn't know the reason , neither did i see the clear one for my behavior that destroyed our relationship once again. You broke up with me , said that it wasn't as it was before , said that i wasn't as i was before - happy , cheerful and optimistic . He fell in love with those personalities of mine . Like this i only made him feel like he's the reason for my misery ! It all ended again and i felt happy -i felt happy that i ended with you 'cause it was obvious that you didn't love me anymore- and i can't love somebody who can't grow to love me even though i was a little different.. Life was passing quickly and very nicely for me . I forgot about you like you forgot about me . Why did i need it all of a sudden ? - For you to tell one of my friends that you're going to ask me to the prom dance at the end of semester !? Next to all those girls you're gonna pick me ? Although i already had two awesome dates for the dance i couldn't resist if he asked me ! We didn't talk talk to each other again for two months after our failed relationship but you're gonna ask me anyways ? THAT MEANT HE LOVED ME , STILL THOUGHT ABOUT ME ! After a few days i went to his facebook wall and saw a song - Plavi Orkestar 'Ako su to samo bile laži' It was a song totally describing me .. us ... That gave me such hope - and the fact that after a long time he started going out where i go out - it was somehow obvious and it caused to light up my heart and feelings for him again ! But yesterday i saw the note you wrote on facebook - it was written in black and white that you forgot about love and started hanging out with girls for fun , and that you don't like the girl you used to like - witch is me ... It broke my heart so , just as i forgot about him he made me remember him and he gave me hope , to end it all with a bang and crushing my heart once again ..